Wednesday, 17 March 2010

In which I get drunk and talk to boys

The trouble with being drunk in a bar is that boys will ask for your number. The trouble with being drunker than you ought is that you'll give it to them. And the trouble with drunkenly giving your number to boys in bars is that you don’t have the foggiest who they are when they call.

How pissed were you on Friday night? I fired off an email to Hot Flyer Boy, with whom I’d been drinking, at the start of the following week.

Enough that it took me six hours to get home because I kept falling asleep on the tube and ending up in bloody Morden, he wrote. Why?

Don’t s’pose you saw me talking to any guys?

Um, some, I think. [Urgh. Inward cringe.] Why?
I seem to have given some guy my number. He’s texted and asked me out for drinks, but I have no idea who he is.

“He’s now in my phone as X open brackets lawyer question mark close brackets from bar,” I said to PolitiGal (also present at the scene of the crime) when I called her at lunchtime to check. “He doesn’t ring any bells with you, does he?”

“Well, I remember some guy coming to talk to you, but I can’t picture his face.”

Any clues? HFB said later on that afternoon, clearly shirking work as much as I was.

He’s called X, I said. Texts seem to suggest he might be a lawyer.

HFB didn’t take too long to mail back.

Might know who he is. My colleague’s housemate brought his friend. He’s called X. Think he’s an investment banker, though.

A few seconds later, another email pinged into the inbox.

Is this him, on the left? Ignore the costume.
I opened a picture to see two guys and a girl, apparently at one of HFB’s themed, fancy-dress pub crawls.

In a moment of stark realisation, it occurred to me that maybe, just maybe, I might have let my hair down just a little too loosely.

Oh gods, I fired back. I still don’t know.

Then you’re a drunken hussy
, he said, and I can’t help you.

Three people and a photograph later, and I still don’t know whether X (lawyer?) From Bar is the person I think he might be.
So, naturally, we’re going out for drinks. Well. What could go wrong?

13 comments:

Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

That, my dear, depends on the prescriptive blur on your beer goggles.

jman said...

Um maybe you should be going out for some tea?

nuttycow said...

Pah - it'll be fine. You obviously thought he was ok when you were drunk. Just get that drunk again and he'll be the same guy!

Rage Against The Dying of the Light said...

All good form, as far as I can tell. After all, what's the worst that can happen?

Mike said...

Somebody needs to option your life for a roller coaster. I'd say movie but then MC would be too much a factor.

Kirses said...

A friend of mine went on a blind date recently and was approached by a man looking for his date - it wasn't her though. Two blind dates in one location - chaos!

Have you asked him to wear a rred rose on his lapel and carry a newspaper...

Emily said...

The problem is, it's a blind date for you but not for him. My advice is to get there early so he has to come up to you. If you have to try to pick him out, you're sunk.

good luck!

Blonde said...

PDEWYMO: Sounds like an excuse for more gin to me.

Jman: Probably. But we all know that won't happen.

NC: A good tactic. I like that.

RATDOTL: Well, quite. It's not as if I have precedent where bad luck and men are concerned.

Mike: I'm up for whichever'll make me the most cash. And cause the least embarrassment.

Kirses: Huh. No, I've not. She should have hedged her bets and picked the guy she thought was going to be most attractive of the two. Which is what I'd have done. Ahem.

Michele said...

Cell Numbers! there may be a clue there ...

Brennig said...

You definitely have to go out with him. He might have been as drunk as you!

P said...

This is possibly the reason why I am totally unapproachable to guys - I'm scared something like this might happen! Kudos to you for actually planning to go - although the theory has to be if he was that horrid, you wouldn't have given him your number in the first place, drunk or not! Good luck!

theperpetualspiral said...

Is it bad that I am already anticipating the blog post about this blind date?

Blonde said...

Michele: Good thought. No such luck.

Bren: In which case, he's going to be horribly disappointed...

P: I like your theory. Let's pretend it's true, and go with it.

TPS: A little. I'm glad my ineptitude serves to amuse.

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