A fourth date is not an event that goes unremarked upon in Social Circle Blonde, due largely to the fact that they’re rather rare beasts (for those keeping score: the last person upon whom the honour was bestowed was the ever-delightful Minor Celebrity. Yes, it’s been a while). It is, of course, entirely in keeping with Blonde logic that I’ve managed to reach date four with a man when there’s a stiletto’s chance in a marathon that the thing has any sort of future.
“Date FOUR? AND you’ve not slept with him yet?! Huh. You do like him…” Curable Romantic’s voice divulged a little more incredulity than I was entirely happy to hear. The verdict from Gay Cousin was worryingly similar: “God, Blonde: that’s practically a long term relationship for you, is it not? I’d better dig out the… well, not that I do hats, but you know…”
Except, they’re wrong. Not inasmuch as it is proving more successful and rather longer-term than recent precedent might suggest, but rather that it’s going anywhere. Because it’s not: this, guys and gals, is expiration dating.
The facts rather speak for themselves: I’m in my final year [and have just completed the disserfuckingtation. Thank buggery. Never has anything elicited more bad language – which is saying something. And I’ve got through two – large – boxes of Earl Grey in ten days. I’m practically pissing bergamot] and, as much as I adore the ‘Burgh, upon graduation, I’ll be moving back down south. The Voice, however, has a business and a mortgage – here. This dalliance has always come with a shelf life.
Which hadn’t bothered me – until the fourth date. I was rather thinking this – like a lot of my other flirtations – would peter out somewhere around the third. But it hasn’t. And there are plans for a fifth. And so, with all this free time I’ve acquired (well, not so much free as Ijustcan’tbearsedtodoanythingproductivewithitsoI’llstayinbedinstead time), I’ve been contemplating the situation.
If there’s an end in sight, then is there any point in doing this? And is it fair to him? A little Facebook stalking recently elicited the information that he’s rather older than I thought he was (and than I am). TV is older to the extent that he’s probably going to be looking to do Marriage and Babies rather sooner than anticipated (especially given the eagerness with which he talks about the teeny, tiny godson). So, am I wasting his time by letting him get into something that’s going to end far before I’m peeing on sticks?
On the other hand, if I don’t date anyone purely because I’m leaving in June, there would be several months of enforced singledom – and I get enough of that without imposing extra on myself. And knowing that the thing has an end-point allows me to have some fun without getting too serious about it. And let’s face it – if a guy isn’t going to join me in profound appreciation of a Hendrick’s and tonic, there’s probably no future in it anyway.
Tags: Dating, Moral dilemmas
In search of the middle ground.
11 minutes ago